I feel like I should start by saying it is seldom, if rare, that my mind is clear enough to think about what I am going to be making for dinner; yet alone, clear enough to be freed of distractions, worries and cares. Free enough to feel okay to sit down and read a devotional chapter. In silence. And to think about it and apply it to my life.

Free enough to hold my youngest in my lap while we lazily watch James "planting a tree" (translation = digging piles of dirt and clumps of leaves into an old coffee container).

Free enough to drive into town and feel okay to take the back roads. Not go the speed limit (to be fair it is 70). Not be in some frantic undefined rush to be somewhere, yesterday, all the while coming up with every conceivable excuse while we are late again. Not to be so consumed with the stress of traffic and pedestrians that singing at the top of our lungs to the Duck Dynasty Christmas Album (for the 723,564,738th time) is the only concern at the moment.

Free enough to be able to wake up, startled, that the sound of school buses and garbage trucks are not roaring past our windows. In fact, all I can hear is the gentle sound of a cow mooing. Out my window. The birds singing. The insects chirping. The wind blowing through the screen in my room. And, I do not feel a sense of panic that I forgot to lock the window last night. The cows were the only possible trespassers near my window this morning and I am pretty sure they were looking for grass.

Free enough to have no fight left in me. In a good way. Today the only argument I had was not the usual one about "Take a nap because I said so" - my children are falling into bed exhausted and sleeping peacefully. My one year old no longer cares if it is her car seat or the pack and play (never before). My 4 year old willingly falls into bed and is out in minutes. But back to the argument. It was with two honry cows that followed me into the barn where I was getting meat out for dinner. Perhaps they were representatives of Chickfila and did not approve of my choice for Beef for Dinner. At any rate, never having herded cows before, it was slightly interesting. But, much better than arguing for hours with a toddler. Almost fun actually.

But, most grateful is the feeling of being free of the overall sense of impending doom that I have felt for months now about having to handle three small children under the age of 4 come June. I have actually thought more positive thoughts about what fun we can have instead of how we will survive. I have felt a sense of peace that has not been with me for a long time. In short, finding time to simply be has been the most rewarding experience for my children and I in a long time. Our only complaint is that Daddy is not here yet (but thankfully will be soon).

2 Thessalonians 3:16 "Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way. The Lord be with all of you."

To peace - and to country life. And, yes to Beef for Dinner.